Healthy Community Initiative

Hi, I’m Lynn. I’m 63 years old, and I just want to tell you my story.

I started out with addiction really late in life.

What happened was, I married a wonderful man in 2004. In 2006, he was diagnosed with esophageal cancer, and my whole world kind of fell apart. They put me on anxiety meds and sleeping meds, and I got very addicted. I did some time in a stress unit and kind of got myself pulled out of that.

Then, a few years later, I went to have some neck surgeries done. This was 2010, and back then, they were giving prescription meds out like it was candy. I became very addicted once again.

After the doctor found out that I was addicted, he cut me off. Not knowing anyone or knowing how to even get drugs, I came up with a really good plan on my own. I thought I could break into houses and steal medication.

I wasn’t a good burglar either, so I left notes and said I was sorry, and I signed them. So, I got caught.

I was facing 15 second-degree burglary charges. I went to jail and went to treatment while I was in jail. It was a really tough program, but I made it.

We had to go back to jail, and my attorney was telling me that if I got a plea agreement for more than three felonies, I would be going to prison.

So when I went to jail, my lawyer told me, “I have a plea agreement for you.” He said, “You can plead guilty to seven.”

And my heart sank. I thought, “Well, I’m going to prison.”

And right after that, he said, “You can go home today.”

It was only by the grace of God that that happened.

I had four years of prison hanging over my head, and I had 20 years of probation. I did eight years of probation, and I did really good. I didn’t have any marks on my record, so they took me off probation.

I was doing really good. I was doing awesome.

And then COVID hit.

I had 12 years of sobriety at that point, and I lost the job that I’d worked at since I had gotten out of jail. I moved up to Grand Forks, where my daughter lived, because she said there were a lot of jobs up there.

I moved to a little town outside of Grand Forks, and I didn’t know anyone. I found a little gas station that had a liquor store. And I’ve never liked alcohol.

I thought, you know, all those times in my NA meetings, they said, “Alcohol is a drug. A drug is a drug.”

But for some reason, I thought I had control over it.

And I lost all those things that I had kept so dear to me.

I stopped going to meetings. I stopped going to church. I stopped all the things that I was supposed to do for my recovery.

My daughter and my grandkids—I have nine grandkids, and my grandkids are my life.

My daughter is an ER nurse, and she sees what happens every day to people who are going through addiction. She didn’t want to see her mom do that anymore.

So she put her foot down and told me I couldn’t see my grandkids anymore unless I got some real help.

I’d already been to five different treatment centers that year, and nothing helped. I would get out, I would do six months, and I thought I had it.

And just as soon as I hit six months, it was like hitting a wall. I would relapse.

There was every excuse in the book that I could find to relapse. Family, you know. And the last one was that my mom passed away. Grief is a really hard thing for me, and I never really even dealt with my husband’s death.

They told me when I was in treatment, “If you don’t deal with this, you’re going to keep coming back.”

I didn’t believe them.

But, like I said, my daughter put her foot down. She wouldn’t let me see my grandkids, and I didn’t know what else to do.

I’d heard Teen Challenge over and over again, so I checked myself into Minneapolis Teen Challenge.

Even then, I thought, “Oh, she’ll be alright if I just stay 45 days.”

She wasn’t okay with that.

So I went into the long-term program. I stayed a year.

It was the hardest thing I’ve ever done. I gave up everything—my apartment, my job, everything.

I didn’t even know how to live like that, with a bunch of women in a big mansion. It was challenging every day.

I think I wanted to leave every week.

But there were just things that kept telling me that this was where I needed to be.

There was one day when I was done. I just said, “I’ve done it. I’m going home. I can’t do this anymore.”

Every Wednesday night, we go to church at Teen Challenge. I went to church with my bags packed and everything.

They broke us out into a little group where we prayed. I didn’t tell them who I was or where I came from or anything. They didn’t know anything about me.

Then I went and sat down, and the girl came back and sat down beside me.

She said, “Can I tell you something?”

I said, “Sure.”

And she said, “God told me to tell you to stay.”

She said, “I don’t know where you’re supposed to stay.”

And I knew right then where I was supposed to stay.

So I stayed.

I graduated from the long-term program in November of this last year, and I moved to Northfield.

And if any of you know who Mindy Mueller is with Restore Recovery, she is one awesome lady.

She takes care of us ladies like—it’s just the greatest thing in the world. She loves us through everything.

I know there’s a lot of girls here that are from her house. And my CPRS that I had when I first came is here.

Without all that help, I just don’t know what I would have done or if I would have made it.

I knew I couldn’t walk back on the street without any kind of support.

So I’ve been here since November.

I worked for AmeriCorps last year at the school. It was really good. I got to meet a lot of cool kids.

But recovery was really my desire.

So I applied for the Ampact Recovery Navigator position, and I got it.

So now I just started at the CAC in Northfield, and it’s amazing.

It’s getting to see people at their lowest and knowing that I was there.

I just want to help anybody that’s on that road and doesn’t have any hope.

And believe me, if I can do this, I’m 63 years old.

Addiction doesn’t know your age, your race, or who you are or anything. It can hit anybody.

My family is really good, and they’ve never been through addiction, so they didn’t even know what to do.

But through Teen Challenge and Restore Recovery, I restored my family. I’m getting that trust back again, and I can feel really proud of myself.

So just, if you’re having doubts or anything, keep on doing it.

Like somebody told me, “Don’t leave before the miracle happens.”

Thank you.